allhailthe70shousewife:

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Once upon a time in the US, skins or casings on hot dogs were commonplace. Some brands in Europe still do these; so when we’ve recently been to a grocery that carries such things and have brought some home, I pause to doublecheck them carefully before starting work on them.

This is because the very first things I ever attempted to cook by myself were a couple of the non-skinless ones. I didn’t really notice the skins, so I just put the hot dogs in the oven to grill.

At which point, once they got hot enough, they near-simultaneously blew up—out the not-quite-sealed ends of the skins, interestingly—and splattered the entire inside of the shiny new oven with mushy pink hot dog innards.

To this day, sometimes, when finishing the business of cooking something new, in the deep recesses of memory I can hear a formerly mortified and thoroughly pissed off ten-year-old muttering, “Well, at least that didn’t blow up.”

pillowspace:

pillowspace:

GIRLY JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT CYERCE ELEGANS

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If Cyerce nigricans is a butterfly, then this is a fairy… Cyerce nigricans for comparison:

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I find it funny whenever i make a sea slug post that gets more notes than expected, like. Yeah, I’m winning at the webbed site (<- made these posts in a sea slug obsessive haze. No one could have seen them and I still would have kept going. It’s my enrichment)

Pretty!

izhunny:
“delgt:
“ xopachi:
“ skwinky:
“ lntruding:
“  Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My...

izhunny:

delgt:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.


UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

Yes

I had to stop halfway through, I laughed until I cried.

inefekt:

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Milky Way at Gilgering, Western Australia

Nikon d810a - 85mm - ISO 6400 - f/2.8
Foreground: 16 x 25 seconds
Sky: 62 x 30 seconds
iOptron SkyTracker - Hoya Starscape filter

solitarelee:

spooniestrong:

solitarelee:

Okay guys I have NEVER recommended anything here other than books and hashtag not sponsored BUT. I just got my Nike Go FlyEase shoes and they are a disability GAME CHANGER for me.

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[img desc: a person steps onto an odd looking sneaker which is folded partially in half. the shoe closes around their foot as they step down]

They are a funky little shoe that literally FOLDS in such a manner that they can be put on and off entirely without your hands; you can just step in and out of them.

The history of them is actually very interesting; the FlyEase line was always designed with disability in mind (the first one was inspired by a teenager with cerebral palsy, Matthew Walzer). They’ve been a thing for years but they never had one that particularly stood out to me amongst other similar shoes… until the Go.

You see, along with being someone who has only a few bends in me per day before it’s all over, I’m also a fall risk. Like a comical fall risk. I’ve fallen into traffic. I will just roll over and die at a moment’s notice. And most slide on shoes are unstable and slip around on your foot. This shoe clamps onto me like a goddamn vice. It’s Got Me. It’s also got good arch support which is like, a plus. By freeing up a bunch of bend-overs per day, this is going to leave me with a lot more ability and energy, especially on the bad days.

They sound too good to be true (I was VERY skeptical buying them despite the video review), but seriously, you can just step into them–and out of them by stepping on that chonky back heel there. God knows I’m not the only person with difficulty sliding on heels or tying laces in the world, so I thought I would be remiss if I didn’t recommend them. If you think they might help you out, they probably WOULD, as they were recommended to me by Footless Jo, an amputee YouTuber, and as mentioned, were inspired in part by people with disabilities ranging from cerebral palsy to past strokes.

They’re Pricey but ultimately average when it comes to Nice Shoes™, the ones I got were $125.

I’d like to add that shoes like these are adaptive clothing products and very important to the disabled community.


Here are 2 more well known adaptive shoe companies:


Kizik



And Billy footwear:

Kikiz is the company that developed this specific tech! Nike opted to fund them rather than buy them out, in part because a lot of their workers were old Nike employees.

calypsolemon:

redroadtoadventure:

redroadtoadventure:

redroadtoadventure:

moonshine-aqua:

redroadtoadventure:

Our son Sam has told us that the D&D art file we use for a screensaver on various devices bothers him.

Because it makes him frustrated that he can’t look at some of them longer. He wants to know what is happening in some of them.

I told him that is one of the reasons we play Dungeons & Dragons, so we can go find out together, in our collective imagination.

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Not really D&D related- but I feel compelled to add to this that not only are these GORGEOUS pixel arts- they are also in fact not animated. There are no frames used. There’s no extra pieces of art. Just one layer.

These pieces are so old that they stem from a time where animating cost way too much memory and/or only 256 colors could be used at one time, so the motion is achieved by ‘color cycling’. Half the available colors would be reserved for that very color cycling. It’s mchecking bonkers, please go watch this video if you feel like learning the technical details of how these artworks were made!
They were screensavers that would match the actual time of day that you were in. Somehow. Just by cycling color palettes. Wild shit.

(Especially relevant time stamps for color cycling: 5:50, 9:55, 37:26, at 49:54 he gets into the technical side of HOW this even works)

Yup.

I’ve always enjoyed how they depicted some of the landscapes at different times of the day/weather/season.

Like these two areas. Daytime and nighttime at the village by the waterfalls.

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And the high mountains hidden by rain in one and visible in the other.

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yall r gonna post a man’s entire portfolio of art and not give credit?

anyways these images are by mark ferrari, a color cycling pixel art master, you can check them out in their html color cycling forms, with sound effects and ability to change the time of day of the image, here and here

wonderbound:

i meant to make some big well-written post abt it but unfortunately my brain was otherwise occupied experiencing The Horrors so instead, have some wordvomit

this past monday marked twenty years since i went on a field trip to the library and ran my hand along a bookshelf in the children’s fiction section and found a book called So You Want To Be A Wizard* and brought it home and read it cover to cover in like. a day. and i couldn’t even begin to explain how that day has shaped my life but i do just wanna acknowledge it and say that i’m so glad my friend let me borrow her library card (cause i didn’t have my own yet) so i could bring the book home and i’m so glad my mum special ordered the rest of the series from the local independent bookstore almost immediately after i finished it and i’m so glad i discovered the forums and i’m so glad i found so many cousins on tumblr—including my best friend and platonic soulmate @astraldepths—and i’m so glad i got to help plan and execute crossingscon (twice!!) and that i got to meet so many of you in person—INCLUDING DD HERSELF—and i’m just. so glad i discovered this series

i have like twelve copies of SYW but i think my favourite is the twentieth anniversary edition (which is now, itself, twenty years old—wild), because it contains both the short story Uptown Local, which i adore, and an afterword by DD, which i have read entirely too many times. anyway, i wanna share a quote from that afterword, bc it seems fitting:

Wizardry, too, changes with the times, because its practitioners do…and indeed it must change, to keep up with the Lone Power, Itself never averse to using new means to Its old end. Even the Wizard’s Oath will seem to change from time to time, altering its appearance according to species, age, cast of mind, and (sometimes) simply according to where you’re standing, in time and space, when you examine it. But beyond that, as the series continues, I can promise that some things will always stay the same—the knowledge of a partner’s dependable friendship; a shared go-for-broke determination to get it right when the Universe is watching; and the glad adrenaline rush caused by the sudden incursion of the unexpected…as when you run your hand down a row of books on a library shelf and one of them catches your finger.

so yeah. in lieu of a more coherent post abt it, i just wanna say. thank you @dduane. for everything 💚

You’re ever so welcome. I’m delighted that the books were there for you…the order in which you found them (or were found) being, as we see, irrelevant.

Meanwhile you’re all going to have to excuse me now, as I seem to have something in my eye. :)

ETA: For folks who’re curious to see if memories are joggled by any of the English-language covers, check out this page at YoungWizards.com.

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